December 19, 2014

I'm not gonna lie, these last few days before I leave for vacation have been rough. I decided to change host families at the last minute, which I feel will be a good change for me, but it was very stressful, especially trying to explain to my current host mom my decision. I did have a good host family experience this semester; I just believe a change will do me good. I am ready to start again with a clean slate. It was a lesson of listening more to first my own feelings rather than worrying so much how other people are going to feel all the time. The first thing is to start by taking care of oneself and if a change is going to help in environments, it will be good. Plus this is the last day I have to spend with my IES friends before they all head back to the States. I'm really going to miss them and they've been there for me a lot during challenging times.

I've never been away from my family this long with no break seeing them. It's been a lot and still dealing with a lot of homesickness during the holidays. It's hard sometimes hearing friends talk about Christmas shopping and the excitement of returning home. I am happy for them, but sometimes it's hard to be around because I am in a completely different mindset. Seeing my auntie will feel so good; I need it.

In the midst of all these difficulties, there have been two things that have stood out to me. I had the opportunity to spend some time with my students from my internship and the profs. The students all contributed to giving me a wonderful box of chocolates and were so appreciative and kind to me, The two profs I have worked with have invited me back to work with them if I wish, which meant a lot to me as well. In the midst of all these difficulties and changes, the outreach of appreciation has touched me and kept me going. That appreciation and feeling of being welcome is the same kind of feeling I have whenever I'm with the Bouchacourts and the Martins. It's one of the reasons I've been able to keep coming back to France. It makes me feel that I am welcome, I belong, and I can be at home here. So I cherish the feeling whenever it comes my way.

 With two of my sweetest students 

 Class selfie